Ironically, one of our favourite long-termers of all time was never originally scheduled to join our fleet. Our asses actually started slipping towards the butter when Audi offered a long-term S3 as a prize to the journalist that performed the quickest lap time around Port Elizabeth’s Aldo Scribante race circuit, on the vehicle’s launch last year.

Former staffer Jesse Adams attended that event for us and his combination of previous experience as a racing driver and determination to win the prize ensured his victory. Jesse allegedly even slept with his helmet the night before and envisaged the track’s intricacies in his sleep. Naturally we were thrilled that he’d won this prize long-termer, which he quickly fell in love with, but he had to say goodbye to it a few months later when he left us to join a national newspaper.

The pity that we’d felt for him upon kissing the S3 goodbye quickly dissipated as the rest of us got a chance to fall in love with it following his departure – Audi had decided that the car would remain with us. Recently it was our turn to bid a soppy farewell to the white mega hatch.

Mega because being powered through all four wheels by a more potent 188kW version of the VW group’s acclaimed four-pot 2.0-litre TFSI engine makes this a recipe for the ultimate sporty hatchback. Its quattro drivetrain gives it the ultimate edge, both around corners and in a straight line. You see, most of its hot hatch rival pretenders are driven through the front wheels, the most powerful example being the Mazda3 MPS.

This Jap is even slightly more powerful than the S3 but can’t match it for pace nor poise. Flatten the loud pedal in this, or rivals like the Opel Astra OPC or SEAT Leon Cupra, and you’d better keep your hands firmly on the steering wheel to counter the car’s sudden obsession with pointing towards objects next to the road. But accelerate full ball in the Audi and the steering remains as composed as a Pavarotti performing a symphony.

The S3 tackles corners with the ultimate in poise and the steering is ultra-precise, even surprisingly communicative for an Audi. While the firm suspension settings augment the S3’s sublime road holding, it does make the ride rather harsh on rough road surfaces. Though it’s not quite bone-jarring, it does border on uncomfortable at times.

The biggest downside is the Audi’s price. At R349 500, those aforementioned rivals suddenly become bargain contenders – some are almost R100K cheaper. But what you get for the S3’s steep price tag is pure mechanical bliss. Stuart even started wondering what body parts he could pawn off in order to buy one.

Our car diminished the affordability factor even further with R70 430 worth of optional extras, which included more exclusive 18-inch alloys, Exclusive bucket seats, the most expensive navigation system complete with a large on-board screen and rain and light sensors. Quite frankly we could have lived without these extras, especially the R42 760 Exclusive front bucket seats in Nappa leather.

Though they proved extremely supportive and comfortable, the drivers seat quickly picked up a nasty scuff mark on the right hand bolster from what we believe is normal wear and tear. What’s more, access to the rear compartment is hindered as the front seats can only slide forward when one pulls the lever below the seat – the high-placed lever that’s normally used in three-door cars only tilts the seats forward. How ridiculous! Once you’re in the back, it is rather comfy though.

Other than those glitches with the seats, the S3 interior garnered much praise. From its stylish design clad in smart and mostly soft-touch plastics to the satin-finish aluminium inserts and the S-badged flat-bottomed steering wheel, it combines sporty with sophistication. The slick and user-friendly gear stick, pleasantly light clutch action and highly-adjustable steering wheel make the cabin like a perfectly-fitting glove.

The only part of the interior that wore excessively, or at all, during our time were the front seats. Almost 20 000 kays into its life, there were no rattles or strange noises to speak about either. In terms of running costs, the five-year/100 000km Freeway Plan is a definite bonus, but the fuel consumption on our unit was unexpectedly heavy. We normally averaged about 12 litres per 100km, that while trying to conserve juice. It was a far grimmer picture when we were hoofing it.

If you can get past the tall asking price, the S3 is undoubtedly the most satisfying hatchback that money can buy at this stage. If you’re interested, there is a minor facelift coming soon, and Audi is also adding a five-door Sportback S3 to the mix.